We've Got It Too Easy

We have it easy. Two events at the end of the summer reminded me of this truism. First, the end of the summer hurricane. Many are still recovering and will be for months. Most people in my neighborhood just suffered some power outages. However, those hours when we were powerless, we felt “powerless.” Small things like doing laundry, opening the door of your refrigerator and even watching television were appreciated. And, how we kvetched about the lack of power! All this was put into perspective when my family visited Lancaster immediately following the storm. We went on an Amish buggy ride and saw an Amish dairy farm. All the backbreaking work of farming without any electricity. No air conditioning. No cars. They truly “rough it” each day. They live their lives without electricity and we were crippled by a few hours or days without power. We most definitely have it easy!

In essence, the Amish have chosen to live as we did centuries ago without the developments we depend upon today. For our children, a day when they can't get reception on their smartphone is “roughing it.” I recently came across an article called, “Kids have it easy” written by the “Over 30 Crowd.” Speaking to the kids today he states, “You've got it so easy! And, I hate to say it, but you kids today, you don't know how good you've got it! When I was a kid we didn't have the internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the library and look it up ourselves, in a card cataloge. There was no e-mail!! We had to actually write somebody a letter- with a pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox, and it would take a week to get there...There were no MP3's or Napsters. If you wanted music you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio... We didn't have call-waiting. If you were on the phone and somebody else called, they got a busy signal- that's it. And, we didn't have fancy Caller ID either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss... You had to pick it up and take your chances...That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980 or before!”

Aside from the lack of dependence on technology, the Amish teenagers work the farms- boys and girls. They awake at 4:00 a.m. alongside their parents, and plow the fields with cattle. The work ethic is incredible. How many of our children truly know the meaning of hard work? As parents, we may be partially responsible as we require less from them than our parents did from us. And, so they have grown to believe that they should get everything for nothing. Working hard does not come naturally. It has to be taught. We need to teach our children that acquiring anything of value demands hard work and it will not come to you on a silver platter. The Amish have it right- chores. If children need to do chores they realize that, for example, if they don't wash the dishes, there will be no clean dishes to eat. In most of our homes, we ask our children to do minimal chores around the house, and even those simple requests become sources of battle with nagging, threatening and even bribing.

With the start of the school year, this topic of a strong work ethic becomes essential for a student's success. In USA Today Partick Welsh wrote an article, “For Once, Blame the Student.” He begins, “Failure in the classroom is often tied to lack of funding, poor teachers or other ills. Here's a thought: Maybe it's the failed work ethic of today's kids. That's what I'm seeing in my school.” He continued to say that he noticed that his American born students did not have the “motivation, self-discipline or work ethic of foreign- born kids.” He then quoted a study which attributed students falling short of their academic potential to “their failure to exercise self- discipline.” When American students are asked what the number one factor is in performing well in math, they state that a good teacher is the determining factor. Japanese students answered that “studying hard” was the factor. Students today are convinced that their effort is not what determines their grades and teachers have become responsible to motivate the child. Students, naturally, are looking to get out of hard work. We, as parents, need to make sure that we do not assist them with avoiding work.

These messages are important ones to speak about with our children as they begin a new year. We need to appreciate the “power” we have. Working hard is important despite how “easy” advancements have made our lives. A strong work ethic comes from the way we raise our children, and from within themselves.