The “Unetaneh Tokef” prayer is for some the climax of the Rosh Hashana davening. We can all hear the words of the Chazan “Mi yichye umi yamut” “Who will live and who will die?” On Rosh Hashana, we are focused on earning a decree from on High for a long life.
What is the secret to longevity? A recent study at Yale University suggests that bibliophilia is the secret. “People who read books regularly may add at least two years to their lives.” Those who read more than thirty minutes a day were 23% less likely to die over the 12 year study. What might be the connection? Perhaps when reading the cognitive processes which impact on longevity, such as empathy, are fostered. In general, the cognitive benefits caused by reading increase the lifespan. (So, next time your child doesn’t want to read, tell him it’s good for his health!)
We are all familiar with the research that being socially active impacts on longevity. However, another recent study, surveying 3,000 people between 57 and 85, at the University of Toronto, found that family is more important to longevity than friends. Those who indicated they had close family had a mortality rate of 6% versus those without close family who had a mortality rate of 14%. Blood is thicker than water. (So, next time your child doesn’t want to visit the relatives, tell her it’s good for her health!)
One other key to longevity has been found to be conscientiousness. In the Longevity Project, Stanford professors Howard Friedman and Leslie Martin found that conscientious people who are “prudent, persistent, well- organized”- not at all care-free and relaxed- tend to live a longer life. They tend to make healthier choices- whether physically or even emotionally. (Yes, another way to convince your child to not be a procrastinator!)
Kindness has also been found to lead to longevity. The research of Dr. Stephen Post in his study, “Altruism, Happiness and Health- It’s Good To Be Good” states, “ The essential conclusion of this article is that a strong correlation exists between the well-being, happiness, health, and longevity of people who are emotionally kind and compassionate in their charitable helping activities... there is wisdom in the words of Proverbs 11:25 “a generous man will prosper, he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed” (Revised Standard Version). It can be said that a generous life is a happier and healthier one.”
Why does giving increase physical health and longevity? It decreases stress, which is associated with health problems. Those who give to others even have lower blood pressure. It promotes “social cooperation,” strengthening our ties to others. This brings us back to the research that social connections increase longevity.
Honesty has also been found to contribute to longevity and health. In a study, subjects were asked to stop lying for ten weeks. Subjects were given polygraph tests weekly to assess their lying behaviors that week. In weeks where the subjects lied less, they reported fewer physical (sore throats, headaches), and mental health complaints. What is the connection? Lying does create stress. “Being conflicted adds an inordinate amount of stress to your life.”
And, then there is mindset. A 2012 Yale Study found that a positive attitude allows people to bounce back more easily from illness and can lead to living up to 7.5 years longer than those who have a negative attitude.
But, what is the secret according to the Torah? There is a Midrash in Vayikra Rabba 16:2 which tells the story of Reb Yannai who had observed a peddler in the marketplace of Tzippori. The peddler yelled out to the shoppers, “Who would like to obtain a potion for a long life?” A crowd of people looking for the secret to longevity surrounded the peddler. He then took out his Sefer Tehillim and read 34:14-15-
יג מִֽי־הָ֭אִישׁ הֶחָפֵ֣ץ חַיִּ֑ים אֹ֘הֵ֥ב יָ֝מִ֗ים לִרְא֥וֹת טֽוֹב: יד נְצֹ֣ר לְשׁוֹנְךָ֣ מֵרָ֑ע וּ֝שְׂפָתֶ֗יךָ מִדַּבֵּ֥ר מִרְמָֽה:
13. Who is the man who desires life, and loves many days, that he may see good?
14. Keep your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking guile
Reb Yannai finished this story by stating that he had read these pesukim all his life, but had never understood them until he heard this peddler.
We all know the power of words and how the lives of others can be destroyed by gossip. What might be the psychological support for not gossiping leading to a long life? (Interestingly enough, there has been research that gossip is actually “good for you” as it can relieve stress?!)
Let us look at the above research on longevity. Lashon Hara creates rifts socially. So, if close social connections foster longevity, it makes sense that breaking those social ties diminishes one’s days. Additionally, a positive outlook on life adds to one’s lifespan. People who gossip tend to focus on the negative, and do not give others the benefit of the doubt. This negativity can lead to a shorter lifespan.
There are two particular mitzvot in the Torah that guarantee a long life for their performance- sending away the mother bird and Kibbud Av Va’Em- Honoring one’s mother and father. What is the common denominator between these two mitzvot? Kindness. With honoring one’s parents, one is to care for them, provide them with food and drink, guide their footsteps when they are old, etc. With sending away the mother bird, the Rambam indicates that this mitzvah also demonstrates kindness as the mother bird need not suffer pain and watch when her eggs are being taken.
Going back to the research on kindness and longevity- it all makes sense. Kindness, whether through Kibbud Av Va’Em or Shiluach Haken, has the physiological benefits and impacts the social connections. Additionally, honoring one’s parents creates the familial ties that have also been shown to impact on longevity.
Another mitzvah in the Torah which indicates a long life- particularly in the Land of Israel- is that of having honesty in business: (Devarim 25:15)
טו אֶ֣בֶן שְׁלֵמָ֤ה וָצֶ֨דֶק֙ יִֽהְיֶה־לָּ֔ךְ אֵיפָ֧ה שְׁלֵמָ֛ה וָצֶ֖דֶק יִֽהְיֶה־לָּ֑ךְ לְמַ֨עַן֙ יַֽאֲרִ֣יכוּ יָמֶ֔יךָ עַ֚ל הָֽאֲדָמָ֔ה אֲשֶׁר־ה אֱלֹהֶ֖יךָ
נֹתֵ֥ן לָֽךְ:
15. But you shall have a perfect and just weight, a perfect and just measure shall you have; that your days may be lengthened in the land which the Lord your God gives you.
This pasuk leads us to the research on honesty and longevity. Clearly, honesty in business is better for your spiritual and physical health!
These “secrets” to long life are really recipes for success in life. We see many of these ideas expressed in the “Al Chet” we say on Yom Kippur:
“And for the sin which we have committed before You with an utterance of the lips.
And for the sin which we have committed before You through speech.
And for the sin which we have committed before You by tale-bearing.
For the sin which we have committed before You by deceiving a fellowman
For the sin which we have committed before You by false denial and lying.
For the sin which we have committed before You by embezzlement.
For the sin which we have committed before You by disrespect for parents and teachers.
And for the sin which we have committed before You by a begrudging eye.”
They are all there. All the secrets to a long life. We need not wonder. We need not search for the fountain of youth or any potion. May we recommit ourselves this Rosh
Hashana to choose life through recommitting ourselves to improvement in these areas and to model them for our children.
Advisory Update:
Sixth Grade- Sixth graders discussed the Success Guides written by last year’s sixth graders with tips on how to succeed in middle school.
Seventh Grade- Students began focusing on why communication skills are essential for relationships.
Eighth Grade- How does one choose a high school? Who do they want to become in the next four years?
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