Mommy Mitzvah Notes

Happy Mother’s Day!  Some months ago I picked up a free Jewish magazine that arrived at my home and the moment I saw this article I knew it would be in my Mother’s Day column.  It was called, “Mommy Mitzvah Notes” by Risa Rotman.  I know these mitzvah notes will make you smile!

Dear Morah of All Mommies,

            Mommy took out the last chocolate bar after cleaning up the entire kitchen.  Just before taking a bite, little Yossi asked for some too. Mommy shared even though it was hard for her.  

To The Morah Of All Mommies,

            Mommy stayed calm when Cheryl had another temper tantrum. Mommy explained to Cheryl why she couldn’t take her to her cousin’s birthday party on the other side of the city, and when Cheryl continued to kvetch, Mommy ignored her and the tantrum finished quickly.

To The Morah Of All Mommies,

            Mommy’s friend asked why they didn’t see a different friend in the park anymore.  Mommy knew why but changed the subject so that she wouldn’t have to speak Lashon Hara.

Dear Morah Of All Mommies,

            Today Mommy’s neighbor got very angry at Mommy because she thought Mommy’s children had created a big mess in the common area.  Mommy knew her kids didn’t make the mess, because they had been at the shoe store with her.   But Mommy stood quietly while the neighbor shouted and didn’t interrupt. What an amazing Mommy!

Dear Morah Of All Mommies,

            Mommy bought some things in the grocery store. She was rushing home in the rain when she realized the cashier had given her too much change.  Mommy ran back to the grocery store to return the money even though the rain was beginning to get stronger.

Dear Morah Of All Mommies,

            Mommy went to the PTA get-together where she saw many of her friends. She was enjoying chatting with them when she noticed a lady sitting by herself. After a few minutes of schmoozing with her friends, Mommy went over to sit with the lonely lady. Kol hakavod to Mommy!

To The Morah Of All Mommies,

            Mommy was waiting patiently at the supermarket when someone pushed her very full wagon in front of her claiming that she’d been there before and just went to find a missing item. Mommy looked at the angry woman, and decided it was not worth arguing, and let her go in front of Mommy.

Dear Morah Of All Mommies,

            Mommy was about to rush through her morning brachot when she decided to say them out loud, concentrating on their meaning, word by word.

Dear Morah Of All Mommies,

            Mommy had a very bad cold this week, yet she managed to make sure everyone had clean clothes and some kind of normal meal.  

As Risa Rotman notes,  (pun intended), “Mommies are all superwomen, but does that mean we don’t do the little things that deserve mitzvah notes? Sure we do!”   There is nothing like the feeling of knowing that the little things you do are noticed and appreciated.  Unfortunately, our children, spouses, bosses, family, or co-workers don’t often write “mitzvah notes” for us.  So, we may need to write those mitzvah notes for ourselves.  

In Advisory we speak to our 7th graders about the power of positive and negative self- talk.  One type of “Positive self- talk” is actually complimenting yourself. Look in the mirror and tell yourself, “You are amazing!”  There is a body image curriculum of which I use a piece with the 7th grade girls called “Full of Yourself.” The normal connotation is to be egotistical and self- centered. But, when I frame it with the girls we discuss

- Liking yourself is not the same as being selfish

- Respecting yourself is not the same as being stuck-up

- Standing up for yourself is not the same as being pushy.

- Taking yourself seriously does not mean that you are too intense

- Telling the truth does not mean that you're too loud or that you talk too much

- Being in touch with your heart is not the same as being too emotional.

The first two items speak to the importance of the fact that you have permission to compliment yourself and to build yourself up. We need to stop being self- critical and focus on our strengths. As Kierea Miller says in her article, “Compliment Yourself!” “It’s time to stop comparing or complaining, and start complimenting.”  As we discuss in Advisory, what we tell ourselves affects how we feel about ourselves. We need to remind ourselves each day about all the things that make us special, or about feats we have achieved!  This type of self- talk is called affirmations.  It is so easy to focus on what we are not good at. We need to focus on what makes us incredible.

            Affirmations are most powerful when you say them out loud and even look in the mirror while doing so.  “I am a wonderful mother!” “I am patient!” “I am beautiful!”  Or perhaps we should write ourselves mitzvah notes and hang them up on our fridge, so that each day when we face the day we remember when every day should truly be Mother’s Day.

Advisory Update:

Sixth Grade: Students began a unit on their cellphone/ iPod  and some dangers that can impact the way they treat others.

Seventh Grade: Students discussed real-life scenarios when they see injustice in their lives and what would they do?

Eighth Grade: There was no Advisory this week due to play practice.