On December 31, in the New York Times Opinion column, Paul Greenberg wrote his article “In Search of Lost Screen Time” “Imagine what we could do with our money, and hours, if we set our phones aside for a year. More than three-quarters of all Americans own a smartphone. In 2018 those 253 million Americans spent $1,380 and 1,460 hours on their smartphone and other mobile devices. That’s 91 waking days; cumulatively, that adds up to 370 billion waking American hours and $349 billion.” Greenberg then goes on to list different projects in which we could engage in 2019 instead of that phone time. One such example is that it takes approximately 700 hours to learn a language. If we put aside our phones, we could learn two languages.
When Rabbi Ross alerted me to this article, I knew that I couldn’t pass up this week on part 2 of my “cell phone sermon.” Not only because of this article but because of the follow-up e-mails from parents, after last week’s column. (Yes, there were still New Year’s parties’ photos posted!) The Times column clearly shows that as adults we have a difficult time “disconnecting.” Dr. David Pelcovitz often quotes a July 2014 study from Science Magazine where subjects who were told to shut off their devices became so distressed that when they were offered an opportunity to administer electroshock to relieve that distress 67% of the men and 25% of the women did so. We cannot tolerate the discomfort of putting away our phones. How much more so do our teens struggle!
When Rabbi Ross alerted me to this article, I knew that I couldn’t pass up this week on part 2 of my “cell phone sermon.” Not only because of this article but because of the follow-up e-mails from parents, after last week’s column. (Yes, there were still New Year’s parties’ photos posted!) The Times column clearly shows that as adults we have a difficult time “disconnecting.” Dr. David Pelcovitz often quotes a July 2014 study from Science Magazine where subjects who were told to shut off their devices became so distressed that when they were offered an opportunity to administer electroshock to relieve that distress 67% of the men and 25% of the women did so. We cannot tolerate the discomfort of putting away our phones. How much more so do our teens struggle!
I referred last week to the article by Yonasan Rosenblum “Our Children Are Begging Us To Stop.” He quotes Chris Anderson, former editor of Wired as comparing the technology we have today to crack cocaine. “It is beyond the capacity of parents to control...it’s going straight to the pleasure centers of the developing brains.” A South Korean study of teens showed that “teens with internet and smartphone addictions showed certain levels of neurotransmitter that results in a reduced level of controls and ability to concentrate without distraction.” A Pew research study from May 2018 says that teens admitting to always being on the internet is 45%, almost doubling from 2014 when it was 24%. A 2016 Common Sense Media survey found that half of teens considered themselves addicted to their phones and other devices. 72% shared that they feel pressured to respond immediately to texts, notifications, and social media postings.
Is there truly such a thing as “cell phone addiction”? As Ana Homayoun notes in her January 17, 2018, New York Times article “Is Your Child a Phone ‘Addict’?”
“although there is currently no official medical recognition of ‘smartphone addiction’ as a disease or disorder, the term refers to obsessive behaviors that disturb the course of daily activities in a way that mirrors patterns similar to substance abuse.”
“although there is currently no official medical recognition of ‘smartphone addiction’ as a disease or disorder, the term refers to obsessive behaviors that disturb the course of daily activities in a way that mirrors patterns similar to substance abuse.”
Here are some questions to ask: Does your teenager’s mood suddenly change and become intensely anxious, irritable, angry or even violent when the phone is taken away or unavailable for use? Does your teen skip or not participate in social events because of time spent on the phone? Another red flag is spending so much time on a smartphone that it affects personal hygiene and normal daily activities (most notably, sleep). Lying, hiding and breaking family rules to spend more time on a smartphone can be cause for alarm, said Hilarie Cash, the chief clinical officer at reSTART, an internet addiction rehabilitation program outside of Seattle.
Rosenblum also quotes the Atlantic article “Have Smartphones Destroyed A Generation?” by Jean Twenge. Twenge studied the generation she calls iGen born between 1995 and 2012, who have “grown up with smartphones, has an Instagram account before they start high school, and do not remember a time before the internet.” As parents of middle schoolers, she shares research that: Eighth-graders who spend 10 or more hours a week on social media are 56 percent more likely to say they’re unhappy than those who devote less time to social media.
And, let us not forget the impact of cell phone use on our children’s grades. A study conducted by the London School of Economics found that banning smartphones led to a clear improvement in scores. Each week I speak to parents, students, and teachers who are worried about their own or their child ’s low performance in school. Often, when digging through the issue, we uncover that the phone is constantly by the child’s side while studying and doing homework. The phone is continually competing for their child’s attention and he/she is clearly not focused on the task at hand. No phones during homework time is often the solution.
The climax of Rosenblum’s article is a survey to which he refers conducted on Yeshiva and seminary students by Debbie Fox. Over 50% of respondents shared that they wish their parents put more restrictions on their device usage. And, so, let us listen to our teens! Let us have time limits on their phone usage, with devices charged not in their bedrooms during the shut-down time. They are begging us to help them stop- during homework time, during sleep time and even when out enjoying their friends. With family vacations come up soon, phone usage and limits is an issue we should already be pondering.
It states in Shemot 32:16 "V'haluchot ma'aseh Elokim heima v'hamichtav michtav Elokim hu charut al haluchot - The Tablets were God's handiwork, and the script was the script of God, engraved on the Tablets.” The Mishna in Avot 6:2 comments on this pasuk, "Al tikrei charut ela chairut she-ein lecha ben chorin ela mi she-oseik b'talmud Torah, she-kol mi she-oseik b'Torah harei zeh mitaleh - do not read charut (engraved), rather chairut (free), only one who studies Torah is free because anyone who studies Torah becomes elevated.” This idea is counterintuitive as we know the mitzvot have so many restrictions, how does that facilitate freedom? True freedom is internal freedom- freedom from urges and desires. Otherwise, one is a “slave” to one's instinct. We need to help our children and free them from “digital enslavement.”
The ideal is to establish some limits and guidelines before we hand the phones to our children the first time. These rules should include when the phone is allowed to be used and the consequences for not following the rules. Apps that help parents monitor use are key. Apple’s Family Sharing and Google Play have settings to help parents monitor use, and most phone carriers have their own parental control options. “Devices like Circle and apps like OurPact give parents the ability to automate access, disable access to certain apps after a certain hour and build in structured time off to promote rest.” And, of course, there is the importance of our being role models in our abilities to shut down and put away the phones.
That brings us back to the Yavneh Parent Committee Suggested Technology Guidelines. We, Yavneh faculty, are grateful to our parents for spearheading this campaign and in particular to Jennifer Hooper and Susan Nadritch, chairs of our parent education committee, and Rachel Jacobs and Keren Nussbaum YPAA presidents. We are also glad to see how many parents have joined this endeavor and have begun implementing the parent committee guidelines in their homes. Our YPAA presidents just sent you an e-mail this past week as a follow-up to the guidelines (which were reattached to that e-mail) regarding unified grade shut-off times. Please take the time to fill out the survey and help us as parents unite to help our children.
Advisory Update:
Sixth Grade: Students set goals for this coming trimester and discussed how to achieve those goals.
Seventh Grade: The girls continued their unit on coping with adversity in life focusing on the importance of mindset and grit. (The boys have missed class the past two weeks due to early dismissals)
Eighth Grade: Students focused on better understanding the parent role in order to better empathize with parents and their needs and worries for us.
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